So there I am, walking with the hottest football player from Queens, clenching my butt cheeks until they were turning blue, so poop wouldn’t drip down my leg!
I CERTAINLY DID ANNA! I sharted all inside my undies, and I was wearing the hottest thong in the world but you know thongs, obviously, it’s not a shitting on kind of fabric. I was like, “Did I shart?! Did I just shart myself?!” You’re not sure if you really shit yourself or not. The moment when you know something doesn’t feel right and you’re not sure if it’s true. It was more like a sssssplishggg! And then there’s that moment. So, I thought it would give me some relief to just, you know, let out a little pffff. We were taking a nice stroll through the park and I had to let out a little bit of gas. I was so busy getting ready all day, that I didn’t have time to eat, so all I had in me was nothing but AIR. I was there, it happened to meeeeee! I was so nervous that when he came to pick me up, I felt bloated. I know, I know, I know….please, God almighty. WORSE! WORSE! WORSE! You will never guess! Ready?! I mean, this guy is hot! I was a complete air head over the whole thing, what should I wear, how much make up should I apply to my face, should I wear a push up bra or stuff the bra? ISSUES! Anyway, we went out and the worst thing in the world happened to me.
He finally took me out last night and I was soooo nervous. No, not that one, FRED, the football player from Queens. Oh my God, I was on a date with Fred, YEAH, the guy I told you about. She shares this upsetting story with her friend Anna.ĮLISE: Anna, you will never believe what happened to me yesterday. Elise crapped her pants on a first date with the hottest football player from Queens.
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